Worst of 2009

Pretty self-explanatory. And I am going to try shorten it up a little bit. So without further adieu, here are the worst:

PAUL BLART: MALL COP- This was obviously geared for kids, hence its G rating, but come on. There was nothing funny about this movie. Not even the kids that were there with laughing. With Kevin James at the helm, I really expected something more.


FIRED UP- I seriously don't know why I saw this. I wasn't expecting much from it. At least it didn't disappoint me. The title of the movie is kid of ironic, because that's probably what most people were after seeing this. Not in the good way either.


WATCHMEN- Sorry to everyone out that loves this movie, but I hated Watchmen. This beginning to the movie was so incredibly boring that I almost lost all interest in finishing the movie out. I don't know why I finished it, because it still was really crappy. Probably one of the biggest disappointments of 20009.


OBSERVE AND REPORT- This feels like evidence to me that Seth Rogen is getting less and less funny, although he did redeem himself in 'Funny People'. I literally can not think of anything to say about this movie, because nothing comes to mind that is worthwhile of saying.


DANCE FLICK- Expectations were pretty low going into this one, knowing that this was a spoof movie. But the jokes were really bad; corny, cheap, just really, REALLY bad. I hope that these spoofs can eventually get their act together, because a really well done one can really be a bright spot in theatres.


NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM: BATTLE AT THE SMITHSONIAN- I don't care how creative you are with your charcters and how many big time actors you can get to work for you, if you don't have a good script, your movie will suck. I could tell what was going to happen in the end, within the first 20 minutes of the movie. What fun is that when watching this? Amy Adams was really good as Amelia Earhart, but nothing else was good about this sequel.


LAND OF THE LOST- Runner up for biggest disappointment. I hadn't seen a lot of Will Ferrell in 2009, so I was hoping for something good from him. At times, this movie was as funny as advertised, but when it wasn't, the movie stunk. There was much room for improvement, and hopefully they saw that so something like this doesn't happen again.


YEAR ONE- Not that funny. I feel like showing the trailers and TV spots for this movie killed it once it was actually released in theatres. I thought at first that I didn't like it because I had such high hopes for a Jack Black/Michael Cera comedy combo, but when I saw it for a second time, I realized that this couldn't be taken seriously as a movie, because of the horrible job of story telling it had.


BRUNO- This movie was flat out stupid. Don't even get my started on the first five minutes of it. I thought that kind of filmmaking was reserved for the adult section of video stores. I can not believe that the producers let this movie fly. It was just outright offensive, not like 'Borat' where Sacha Baron Cohen's character just played dumb. Huge let down for all the press this movie got.


G-FORCE- This movie makes me laugh at how bad it was. I think that the story was just a stretch itself. There's only so much you can do with secret agent guinea pigs. I'm actually impressed with how much they got out of it. The fact that it was in 3-D didn't help either. I'm sure it was a hit with the kids, but I guarantee you any age group outside of that probably hated it.


SHORTS- Oh no. I don't even know why I'm putting myself through typing about this. Worst movie of 2009. I hated this so much. It was like the director and every member of his cast are pulling a prank on the viewer, making us think that this is an actual movie. Everything about this movie is annoying. If you have kids that are jacked up on sugar, they'll love it, because that's how unfocused and frenetic this movie is. Garbage, in my opinion.


JENNIFER'S BODY- Runner-up to garbage movie of the year. Yeah people went and saw it for Megan Fox, but I hope that when they saw it they saw just an abismal movie. A girl that feasts on men to stay alive? Really? That's what you came up with? Yikes.


2012- The end of the world movie that I'm sure nobody was anticipating. What's that? They've made like 5 of these movies before? About end of the world events? This one will be better, right? At 158 minutes, 130 of them being pure action and destruction, this would probably be the biggest waste of your money you could spend on a movie in 2009.