Worst of 2009

Pretty self-explanatory. And I am going to try shorten it up a little bit. So without further adieu, here are the worst:

PAUL BLART: MALL COP- This was obviously geared for kids, hence its G rating, but come on. There was nothing funny about this movie. Not even the kids that were there with laughing. With Kevin James at the helm, I really expected something more.


FIRED UP- I seriously don't know why I saw this. I wasn't expecting much from it. At least it didn't disappoint me. The title of the movie is kid of ironic, because that's probably what most people were after seeing this. Not in the good way either.


WATCHMEN- Sorry to everyone out that loves this movie, but I hated Watchmen. This beginning to the movie was so incredibly boring that I almost lost all interest in finishing the movie out. I don't know why I finished it, because it still was really crappy. Probably one of the biggest disappointments of 20009.


OBSERVE AND REPORT- This feels like evidence to me that Seth Rogen is getting less and less funny, although he did redeem himself in 'Funny People'. I literally can not think of anything to say about this movie, because nothing comes to mind that is worthwhile of saying.


DANCE FLICK- Expectations were pretty low going into this one, knowing that this was a spoof movie. But the jokes were really bad; corny, cheap, just really, REALLY bad. I hope that these spoofs can eventually get their act together, because a really well done one can really be a bright spot in theatres.


NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM: BATTLE AT THE SMITHSONIAN- I don't care how creative you are with your charcters and how many big time actors you can get to work for you, if you don't have a good script, your movie will suck. I could tell what was going to happen in the end, within the first 20 minutes of the movie. What fun is that when watching this? Amy Adams was really good as Amelia Earhart, but nothing else was good about this sequel.


LAND OF THE LOST- Runner up for biggest disappointment. I hadn't seen a lot of Will Ferrell in 2009, so I was hoping for something good from him. At times, this movie was as funny as advertised, but when it wasn't, the movie stunk. There was much room for improvement, and hopefully they saw that so something like this doesn't happen again.


YEAR ONE- Not that funny. I feel like showing the trailers and TV spots for this movie killed it once it was actually released in theatres. I thought at first that I didn't like it because I had such high hopes for a Jack Black/Michael Cera comedy combo, but when I saw it for a second time, I realized that this couldn't be taken seriously as a movie, because of the horrible job of story telling it had.


BRUNO- This movie was flat out stupid. Don't even get my started on the first five minutes of it. I thought that kind of filmmaking was reserved for the adult section of video stores. I can not believe that the producers let this movie fly. It was just outright offensive, not like 'Borat' where Sacha Baron Cohen's character just played dumb. Huge let down for all the press this movie got.


G-FORCE- This movie makes me laugh at how bad it was. I think that the story was just a stretch itself. There's only so much you can do with secret agent guinea pigs. I'm actually impressed with how much they got out of it. The fact that it was in 3-D didn't help either. I'm sure it was a hit with the kids, but I guarantee you any age group outside of that probably hated it.


SHORTS- Oh no. I don't even know why I'm putting myself through typing about this. Worst movie of 2009. I hated this so much. It was like the director and every member of his cast are pulling a prank on the viewer, making us think that this is an actual movie. Everything about this movie is annoying. If you have kids that are jacked up on sugar, they'll love it, because that's how unfocused and frenetic this movie is. Garbage, in my opinion.


JENNIFER'S BODY- Runner-up to garbage movie of the year. Yeah people went and saw it for Megan Fox, but I hope that when they saw it they saw just an abismal movie. A girl that feasts on men to stay alive? Really? That's what you came up with? Yikes.


2012- The end of the world movie that I'm sure nobody was anticipating. What's that? They've made like 5 of these movies before? About end of the world events? This one will be better, right? At 158 minutes, 130 of them being pure action and destruction, this would probably be the biggest waste of your money you could spend on a movie in 2009.

Best of 2009

Although it is almost time to ring in the bell for the new year, I'd like to take a moment and look back to what has happened in the movies over this last year. There have been some duds (we'll get to that a little later), but there have also been some very bright spots. I'd like to dedicate this article to those movies that stood above the rest. Disclaimer: these are only selected from the list of movies that I have seen the whole way through, there are handfuls of hidden gems that could be discussed. Nevertheless, here is the list, in no particular order, for best movies of 2009.

SIN NOMBRE- This is the story of two very different paths crossing, but striving for the same goal. On one path is a honduran teenage girl named Sayra. Sayra and her family are taking the opportunity while it lasts to essentially 'train-hop' to the United States. On her journey she comes across El Casper, a member of the MS-13 gang. He has realized how violent his lifestyle has become, and he is looking for a way out. This doesn't make the gang happy, so they decide to kill him for leaving. Now Sayra and El Casper are running away from their old lives and hoping to reach their dream. The United States and a brand new start.


GOODBYE SOLO-This is the story of two unlikely people meeting, and how it changes both their lives forever. It is also the story of one man's life winding up, while one's is just starting. A newly immigrated man from Senegal, named Solo, gets a job as a cab driver. One of his passengers, William, asks Solo to take him up to a very specific mountain and to not pick him up. Solo then takes it upon himself to find out why, and the journey that these two men end up taking is one that could be celebrated during Oscar season.


STAR TREK- The first 'blockbuster' of the year, 'Star Trek' was down right awesome. The ever-so-familiar story of Captain Kirk and Spock and the rest of the crew is rewound all the way to the very beginnning of their reign. Led by newcomers Chris Pine and Zachary Quinto, this will surely set up a new Star Trek dynasty, and bring in a whole new generation just like the last ones did.


RUDO Y CURSI- This is the story of two brothers experiencing the dream of professional soccer in Mexico together at the same time. They both go through their trials and tribulations, and their careers eventually are on the line due to their shortcomings. If you don't mind reading subtitles the whole time, then this is a must see.


THE HANGOVER- This was the biggest hit of the summer. A hilarious comedy about having one hell of a night in Vegas in celebration of a bachelor party, and then not remembering one thing the next day; all on top of losing the groom in the course of the night/morning. A really funny twist on the mystery genre. If you have not seen this movie yet, do it immediately.


THE HURT LOCKER- Hands down my favorite movie of the year. This is the most tense and on-edge you will ever feel at a movie. A story about the difficulties and stresses of being on a bomb-defusing unit out in Iraq, this movie is flawless in almost every single way, and will surely need a few hands to hold all the Oscars it could recieve.


(500) DAYS OF SUMMER- The best romantic comedy in the last five years. It is so fresh in the way the story is told, that it is an automatic easy-to-watch film. The chemistry between leads Zooey Deschanel and Joseph Gordon-Levitt will have you trying to relate this to any past relationships you've had, thus proving that this is one of the more authentic and refreshing comedies in a while.


THE COVE- This thrilling documentary about to secretive killing of dolphins in Japan will surely bring a few Oscars home. The thing that is most fun to watch in this film is that the film crew wasn't allowed to get their shots the way they wanted, so they had to do everything secretly; whether it be hidden cameras in trees or underwater, or shooting things at ridculous hours in the morning just to have something substantial. The results of what they ended up getting are incredible and shocking.


ZOMBIELAND- You can thank lead actor Jessee Eisenberg for getting this one on the list. It's not a tremendous movie by any means, but his comedic timing had me laughing throughout. Also, something about swarming zombies and an amusement park in the final act just worked for me.


PRECIOUS- Wow. This movie was phenominal. Held together by very strong acting, this movie (based on the novel by Sapphire) will have you holding back tears for longer than you could imagine. You will not be more touched by a movie this year.


FANTASTIC MR. FOX-Shot in stop-motion animation, this quick-witted, hilarious, and creative comedy will be a hit with every generation. Voiced by George Clooney, Meryl Streep, and Bill Murray, 'Mr. Fox' will be one that you'll have to look for on DVD.


UP IN THE AIR- Never have I watched a movie that was more relevant to the times we are in than this one. Lead by George Clooney, this movie about recession and how people deal with losing jobs in tough times is very well choreographed by director Jason Reitman. It went along pretty slowly, but I enjoyed every minute I had my eyes on that screen.


INVICTUS- If you are looking for that pick-me-up or that inspirational boost, this is the movie to see. A true story about the presidency of Nelson Mandela in South Africa and his relationship with national rugby team, Morgan Freeman and Matt Damon deliver and then some on this sure to be Oscar winner.


AVATAR- This is undoubtedly the most hyped up movie of the year. Directed by James Cameron, who won an Oscar for 'Titanic', and hasn't made a movie until this one, delivers on every level. The movie is highly regarded for it's visual effects, which are absolutely incredible. However, the story itself holds its ground, all in all making a very wortwhile movie; one that everyone that loves movies should go out and see.

Invictus

As of December 11th, viewers have been able to see the movie that may take home a handful of Oscars, 'Invictus'. This is the story of two people bring others together. The first story is of Nelson Mandela and his time as President of South Africa. Up until this point in his life, Mandela was imprisoned for about 30 years, because of his anti-apartheid stance. As they show in the movie, Mandela's cell had a single wooden chair in the middle of the room, with a blanket and possibly a thin cot on the floor, accompanied with a pillow. Think about that. 30 years of that kind of life? How he endured it I don't know.

Anyways, after his release on February 11, 1990 he decided to run for President of South Africa. On May 10, 1994, with 62 percent of the vote, Mandela became the first black president of South Africa. Obviously this wasn't warmly recieved by everyone, because there was a ton of racial tension still amgongst the South Africans. Mandela preached that reconciliation would be the necessary step to uniting the country again. The other story of reconciliation is with the South African rugby team, the Springboks. They are in a current slump, much to the shagrin of the country. Racial seperation is shown in their first match the viewer sees, when a man explains to Mandela that the whites are cheering for the Springboks, while the blacks are cheering for England. The reason why they don't cheer for their Springboks, is because it reminds them of the Apartheid and all that happened to them during that time. Mandela than gets news that the Rugby World Cup, hosted in South Africa, is only a year away. He then sends out an invitation for the captain of the Springboks, Francois Pienaar (Matt Damon) to have tea with him. During their meeting, a message is given to Damon that he will have to rally the Springboks, and win over the black portion of South Africa, thus uniting the nation behind their World Cup run.

This is one of the more inspiring movies I've seen in a while. Morgan Freeman as Mandela and Matt Damon as Pienaar will probably be heavy favorites for Best Actor and Supporting Actor respectively. To me this movie shows what the human spirit is capable of. Not many people, after being in prison for 30 years, would do what Mandela did. He did not show any anger, but yet compassion for the same people that threw him in jail. So, if you're looking for that pick-me-up during this dreary winter session, go out and see this; you can't help but feel good after it.

Rating: 3.5 out of 4 stars

Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9Ovkye6lac

The Fantastic Mr. Fox

Those of you who are fans of the Cartoon Network show 'Robot Chicken' are probably familiar with the stop-motion technique of animation. What stop-motion does in animation is that it takes a physically manipulated object, and makes it appear as if it is moving on it's own. The object is moved slowly in a frame-by-frame sequence, giving it the illusion that the object is actually moving by itself. Clay figures are usually used to do this, because they can be easily repositioned. So why am I telling you all of this? Because 'The Fantastic Mr. Fox' is one hundred percent stop-motion animation. The difference between this film and most of it's kind is that they used animals, not just clay figures. I seriously thought this was a joke when I saw the trailer for the first time, but the more I read up on it, the more amazed I was at the process. Then, after sitting through a brief 87 minutes of this new animation, I was astounded. It was awesome.


Lead by Academy Award winners George Clooney and Meryl Streep, 'The Fantastic Mr. Fox' is about battle between good and evil, good being represented by Mr. Fox and company, and bad being represented by the three bad farmers: Boggis, Bunce, and Bean. It starts with Felicity (Mrs. Fox) telling her husband that she is pregnant and wants them to stop robbing farmers of their produce and instead get real jobs. When Mr. Fox realizes that he doesn't have a whole lot of 'fox years' left, he makes a bold move and moves into a house in a tree. This is not a wise move according to his lawyer, Badger (Bill Murray), because it is right across the field from the three farmers' respective houses. Two years go by and nothing really is keeping Fox's interest anymore, so he decides to go and rob each of the farmer's house of produce, whether it be duck, chicken, or alocholic cider. Once the farmers find out what Fox has done, they plan an attack on him. Their first attempt fails, but it sends the message. Now Fox and his family are stuck, with nowhere really to go. The following sequence of events all work well together and turn out to make a pretty watchable wild goose chase.


This movie may be a little rough on the eyes, because of the choppiness of stop-motion, but it's so revolutionary that it didn't even matter. I personally would never expect to see a movie made like this because it seems like such a foolish way to be shot, but I was wrong. It's incredible. This adaptation of the popular children's book of the same name is a crowd-pleaser; child, teen, or adult. There's something to be said about how different people's visions can be when they make a movie, but when it is this enjoyable, it doesn't really matter how you make it.


Rating: 3 out of 4 stars
Trailer:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n2igjYFojUo

Up in the Air

As the poster above implies, this is the third big time film for director Jason Reitman. He is known for his work in 'Juno' and 'Thank You For Smoking'. He has also directed episodes of 'The Office' and 'Saturday Night Live'. In all of his work that I've seen, there's definitely been that indie feel to everything involved in the movie. He has never had the big star under his direction, which probably has been key in his early success. Now, however, he had the opportunity to direct George Clooney. I was a bit worried when I had heard this because I thought that Reitman was going to pull strongly for whatever he wanted, and in the end, would have made this a dud. This does not have that indie feel to it at all; and in fact, it actually turned out to be a very interesting movie, worthy of all the Oscar buzz.

'Up in the Air' is about a traveling man named Ryan Bingham, played by Clooney. What Ryan does for a living is pretty brutal. He has to fly around the country and lay off different employees from different workplaces for the bosses who are too cowardly to do it themselves. He also from time to time will give motivational speeches about having a relationship-free life, using a backpack as an analogy. This seems like a terrible job to have, but Ryan actually enjoys what he does. He loves the fact that he is pretty much anonymous during his traveling, which is why he has never really kept close to his family and does not have much of a personal life. Because of all the flying that he is doing, he is also close to acheiving a personal goal of his: ten million frequent flyer miles (only six others have done this). During one of his stops, he meets a woman named Alex, who describes herself to Ryan as, "like you but with a vagina". They then decide to pursue a casual relationship, seeing as how it would be too difficult and unecessary to start a legitimate one. When Ryan is grounded for a few days out of the year, he learns from his boss (played by Jason Bateman) that they are developing a new way of letting people go, this time via webcam. It is being developed by a fresh out of college grad, named Natalie Keener. Bingham and her immediately clash, leading Bateman's character to force Bingham to bring Natalie on his next stint in the air. While on their trip together, Natalie learns the ins-and-outs of the interpersonal side of the job, while Bingham is being challenged as to why he chooses his relationship-free lifestyle. They both begin to realize the disheartening parts of their issues at hand, and they eventually have to figure out what they want out of their new lives.

There is something that fascinates me with this film. It is so 'real'. It is one hundred percent believable. It is especially relevant with the times we are currently in. People probably have been laid off in a similar way to this recently. I also think that this can raise the question of what life would be like if you chose to isolate yourself from everyone. It makes you think about where you are at whatever point of your life you are in. A very thought provoking and honest film, but it being a smidge slow at times keeps it from the perfect score. But look for this to do some serious damage come Oscar time.

Rating: 3.5 out of 4 stars

Trailer:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_m-Da8Tz4_E

Avatar

This all started way back in 1994, when director James Cameron wrote an 114 page script for this film. 15 years ago, Tanya Harding was in the spotlight for her infamous attack on Nancy Kerrigan during the Olympics. This is back when Forrest Gump was recieving an Oscar for Best Picture. This is a serious gap in time. It was officially announced in 1997 that Cameron was going to make 'Avatar', just after raking in multiple Oscars for his most recent film, 'Titanic'. Unfortunately, the technology Cameron had hoped for wasn't available until roughly 2007. I am very glad that he waited, because what he has made will be talked about for years to come.

This film takes place in the year 2154 on an Earth-sized moon named Pandora. The RDA corporation is there because they are interested in mining a rare mineral, called unobtanium. However, there are many obstacles facing the crew. The humans can not breathe on Pandora. Therefore, they have to create these genetic hybrids between humans and the natives, called the Na'vi. These hybrids are called avatars. These avatars are controlled by humans, who stay in the lab and lay in these pods that basically look like tanning beds. The people controlling the avatars are called 'drivers'. The three we meet are Jake, Norm, and Dr. Augustine. Jake, played by Sam Worthington is a ex-marine who lost the use of his legs in battle. His twin brother was initially supposed to be on this mission, but because of his untimely death, Jake was asked to participate. The goal of these 'drivers' are to become friendly with the Na'vi, in hopes to be able to convince them to move away from their current location, so the military can recieve the unobtanium. On their first night out, Jake gets left behind after running away from what looks like a hammerhead rhino. When Jake is roaming around trying to survive the night, he comes across little tiny dog-like creatures, called viperwolves. They surround him and then attack. Lucky for Jake, a native names Neytiri comes to his rescue. He is thankful for her help, but she is upset with him because of his abuse of the animals. He is curious as to why she is so upset at him, so he begins to follow her when she takes off. He is then captured by the other natives, who are not very fond of Jake and his fake avatars, also known as 'sky people'. After a decision to spare his life, the Na'vi assign Neytiri to show Jake the way of their people, whether it be sleeping in a leafy cocoon, taming a flying banshee, or learning the language of the Na'vi. Jake then has to return to his human body while his avatar self is asleep, and thus begins the seperation between the two sides. Jake realizes that the humans are being absolutely outlandish in their quest and, as he grows closer and closer with the Na'vi, begins to rebel against his own race. He then must decide which is more important to him, and thus begins another big battle between humans and nature.

Although the dialogue at times is really dull, this movie has to be seen for it's special effects. It is like nothing you could ever imagine. You can't imagine it because you have not seen anything like this. I have seen this movie twice, and both times I have been absolutely blown away by what I see. I have heard criticism that this movie is all special effects and no plot, but that is simply untrue. The dialogue is a bit lacking, but the plot very much holds it's own. There is so much going on in this movie that it actually becomes very difficult to sum it all up in a review like this. All I can really say is that you should go see this movie, because the experience you'll have will be one worth well beyond what you pay for the movie (the prices for 2-D and 3-D vary.)

Rating: 4 out of 4 stars

Trailer:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-9ceBgWV8io

Best Christmas Movies

Because we won't be around to write an article during the holiday season, we figured we would give you a list of some of the best movies of the season. These are in no particular order, because to us, it was way too hard to pick a favorite. Also, we had a deadline to meet. So here goes.

A Christmas Story (1983)- A story about a kid named Ralphie Parker, and his dream to get a Red Ryder BB gun. He has to overcome all the obstacles leading up to Christmas, including everyone telling him that the gun will make him 'shoot his eye out'. A instant holiday classic and a must see every year.

Miracle on 34th Street (1947)- Desperate to find a new department santa, Macy's executive Doris sets hires a man named Kris Kringle. Kris is insistent that he actually is Santa, but Doris and her daughter, among others are skeptic. Is he the real santa? Kris tries to prove himeself to be the real Santa in this unforgettable film.

Home Alone (1990)- Who hasn't seen this classic movie? Left at home by his whole family, Kevin McCallister tries to survive boredom, robbers, and the terrifying pigeon lady and shovel guy. Oh, and how could i forget, the single most horrifying furnace in any household imaginable.

A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965)- Probably a favorite amongst most, A Charlie Brown Christmas takes us through the struggles of Charlie's attempt to run a Christmas pageant, and shows us in the end what the real meaning of Christmas is.

It's A Wonderful Life (1946)- An oldie but a goodie, "It's a Wonderful Life" is a story of a magnanimous business who fights against the power of greed. It's also a story about a man George, who gives up all of his dreams for the good of his town. An absolutely perfect movie for this time of the year.

Elf (2003)- A smash hit for the current generation. "Elf" is about an elf named Buddy, fresh off a trip from the North Pole to New York City, trying to fit in to his new lifestyle. Althought everything around hims is changing rapidly, Buddy never changed who he is, and eventually convinces the city, who is down on their 'Christmas spirit', to believe again.